Is There A Front And Back To Harry Styles Stage Good Nerves – Your Secret to Speaking Success

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Good Nerves – Your Secret to Speaking Success

This is the most common question a public speaking coach receives: “Can you help me not get nervous in front of an audience?” And the honest answer is: “No.” Famous singers Rihanna, Beyoncé and Harry Styles admit that they are nervous, which makes them feel bad. Adele once said: “At one show in Amsterdam, I was so nervous that I ran out the fire exit.” Actress Emma Watson described it as “a kind of paralysis.”

So, if professional performers suffer from such anxiety, what hope is there for the rest of us? Do not despair. Although it may not be possible to eliminate nervousness, you can turn “bad” nerves into “good” ones. Here are some tips I’ve used over thirty years of training, so I know they work.

1. Stop trying to avoid the inevitable

Before going on stage, the head of most speakers is full of impossible wishes – dreams that are destined to come true. They hope they don’t end up with an “empty mind” or get lost. They will probably spend the rest of their presentation regretting it. Instead, they should remind themselves of the following facts:

• Most gaps last less than two seconds (although it seems much longer when you’re there). This means that most listeners won’t even notice it, and if they do, they’ll think you’re pausing for effect.

• Reviewing notes to refresh your memory or get back on track won’t hurt your presentation. This adds to your credibility because it shows that you are prepared and have taken the time beforehand to organize your thoughts. The audience judges your credibility by the topic, not by your memory. So, prepare your notes clearly so that you can tell yourself when this happens.

2. Understand your nervousness

Speaking in front of a group should make you feel nervous because it takes away from people’s valuable time. Guys are most worried when nervousness catches them off guard. They think, “I expected to be nervous, but I didn’t expect to be THIS nervous!” Experience shows that we all have a special audience about which we feel more anxiety than others. They can be friends, strangers, family, peers, superiors or subordinates. Find out which group is right for you so it doesn’t catch you off guard.

3. Control what you can

Many speakers say the worst feeling is being “out of control” – when everyone is watching. Standing in front of an audience causes an adrenaline rush. You can’t control it, and it can lead to talking too fast, uncoordinated movements, voice tremors, shortness of breath, dry mouth, flushing, sweating, and a host of other unpleasant symptoms. There are targeted actions you can take to counteract this – take back control. Set yourself up by taking deep breaths before you speak, slow down by moving into your speaking position in a measured, deliberate manner, and have water nearby to swallow if your mouth gets dry.

4. Stop trying to please everyone

Okay, this may not count when you’re giving a wedding toast, but in business presentations, if you change your speech to only say what everyone agrees with, it will be so bland that no one will want to listen. Expressing an alternative point of view and supporting it with valid arguments will always be more attractive than meaningless platitudes.

5. You don’t have to be the expert in the room

Some speakers convince themselves that in order to speak on a topic, they must be the best expert on that topic. Not so. Don’t try to play the expert. You have unique experiences and perspectives on this topic that provide valuable information. This is your gift to the audience.

Nervousness when speaking in front of an audience is natural. Stop trying to avoid it and use these tips to make it work for you.

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