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Can I Get Him to Be More Serious About Me? Tips to Help Make It Happen
Relationships are unique beasts. They generally take on a life of their own and progress at a pace that hopefully syncs with what both the woman and man involved want. Sometimes the couple is walking down two separate paths and one is headed for something more serious, while the other seems content to casually hang out. More often than not it is the woman who wants to secure a commitment to her boyfriend. We women understand this, since we recognize how rare it is to find a man who satisfies us in every way. Without giving your boyfriend an ultimatum, are there any other ways to get him to get more serious with you? You might think not, but there are actually a number of very simple, yet incredibly effective, steps you can take to show him why you’re the woman he should dedicate his heart and life to.
Make the relationship fun and as drama-free as possible
You wouldn’t be surprised at all if I said that women tend to be more dramatic than men when it comes to relationships, right? We all know it’s true. As women, we often seem to stumble upon issues waiting to be addressed. We raise them with the man we adore and before we know it, they’ve taken on a life of their own and an argument ensues. For men there really is no rhyme or reason to this. All they want is to have a relationship that is emotionally rewarding, fun, and easy. Men don’t want to be in a relationship that is hard work. They don’t like anything.
That’s why it’s essential that you keep drama, within your relationship, to a minimum. Overlooking the little things has many advantages. I know it can be worrisome to be with a man who sometimes glances the way of a passing pretty girl and it can be discouraging if he doesn’t always remember your birthday or other important events. You need to evaluate how important those things are to you versus how satisfying it is when the relationship is in a good, peaceful, loving place. As hard as it is, overlooking the small, inconsequential things can help draw a man to you because he’ll see you as someone who doesn’t take life too seriously.
Don’t go on and on about the future
It’s incredibly hard not to focus on where you want the relationship to go when you think it’s the “ideal” connection for you. As a woman, you probably like to plan things and your future definitely falls into that category. If you take the relationship to the next level before your boyfriend is ready to listen, an invisible emotional barrier will appear and fight you to move things to a more serious place. A man who isn’t sure he wants to commit can become very protective of his space and time.
If you act like you couldn’t care less if the relationship ended in a more committed place, he’ll find you incredibly charming and intriguing. Men are used to dealing with women who are chasing the dream of a wedding and a happy, committed future. You know that sooner or later, if the two of you are hitting it off, the inevitable conversation about how many kids you want or what style of home you want to live in is on the not-too-distant horizon. Surprise him by staying mum on anything engagement related. If you can do that, sooner rather than later you’ll wonder why you’re not eager for him to take the relationship to a more serious place.
Don’t lose focus on your own goals
One of the biggest mistakes women make when trying to build a strong and lasting connection with a man is that they start sacrificing their own life for his. If you start giving up your own interests, your own career goals, or your friends for a man, he will find you much less interesting. He doesn’t want you to lay down your life for him. First, it shows that you don’t value yourself as an important, valuable, and successful human being. You are willing to trade what you want for a man. Any man who finds out what to look for is not worth a relationship because he will take your behavior as a sign that you want to be controlled.
Also, if you start giving up the things you love to spend more time with your boyfriend, it makes him feel like he has to fill all that empty space. In other words, if you repeatedly cancel plans with friends or rearrange your work schedule to accommodate him, he will feel responsible for your time and happiness. That’s a heavy burden for any man in a growing relationship. You don’t want that to happen.
Show your man that you are not willing to sacrifice the woman you are for him. It’s important that you understand that it has to fit into the life you already have. If he feels, even for a moment, that you are depending on him for your happiness or that he has to be there to occupy your time, he will begin to feel pressure or resentment, and eventually the relationship will likely fail.
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