How To Get Weird Of Blue Style On Microsoft Word Verbal Abuse Disguised As Jokes That Ridicule And Demean You

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Verbal Abuse Disguised As Jokes That Ridicule And Demean You

He says he’s just kidding…but my core felt degraded and devalued.

Verbal abuse can start as small digs disguised as jokes. Your boyfriend or husband teases, mocks and humiliates you with snide comments about your appearance, personality, skills and values. If you tell him, “I don’t think that’s funny,” or ask him to stop “teasing you,” he may become defensive, irritated, or angry.

He tells you, “You’re too sensitive” or “You can’t take a joke.” His pleas of guilt are convincing, making you question your ability to reason. Ask yourself if you are overreacting and doubt your perception of his abuse.

His denial of your experience of his abuse adds another layer to his abuse.

Make comments about yourself in front of friends who make fun of you or put you down. He hides his acrimony with a satisfied smile and a laugh. His public ridicule is unexpected, off-balance and embarrassing and humiliating. Your friends may laugh at their antics, but your heart has felt the blow and your brain struggles to interpret the true meaning of their humiliation. If you show shock or displeasure, I might give you a hug and tell you I was just “kidding.” Keep up your good-guy facade and your friends wonder why you’re getting so excited over a meaningless prank.

It takes a quick mind to come up with ways to snub your partner rudely or with wit and style. This type of abuse is not done in jest. Cut fast, touch the most sensitive areas and leave the abuser with a look of triumph. This abuse never seems funny because it isn’t funny.- Patricia Evans, The Verbally Abusive Relationship

Over time, their ridicule and humiliation can seriously damage their self-esteem, sense of self, and integrity.

I should have paid attention the first time Dr. Dirtbag ridiculed me about my weight. We were having dinner in front of the TV and out of the blue he said, “You know, the reason fat people are fat is that they don’t know when to stop eating. Your plate is so fat. Clean up when you’re done eating me, or I don’t even have to wash it.”

I froze half a bite. He could see the hurt in my eyes. Instead of apologizing, he feigned innocence, saying, “Oh, did I say something wrong?” He swore he didn’t mean it, but he never apologized. Instead, he blamed me, saying, “Geez, I was just trying to help. You told me you wanted to lose five pounds. I can’t tell you anything. I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

His only purpose was to surprise and hurt me with his spiteful humiliation.

Examples of verbal abuse disguised as jokes:

She doesn’t remember anything; it has sticky notes all over it.

She is so funny; she burns everything she cooks.

She can’t find her way to the grocery store without a GPS.

Having a bad hair day?

You act like your mother. (We all know he’s bat** not crazy.)

You’d forget your name if it wasn’t on your driver’s license.

He’s saying, I can say whatever I want to say about you because I’m “just” being funny.

Understand, the sole purpose of their hostile and derogatory humor is to victimize, belittle, and insult you. If you don’t react to his ridicule, he won’t be able to control you, dominate you, and dominate you.

How to react to verbal abuse disguised as jokes.

  • Don’t be drawn in by their attempt to bring you down. Don’t accept their excuses. DO NOT get into a debate with him.

  • Tell him emphatically, that you do not like to be the main of his mood and you want him to stop, do not stay with his answer.

  • Say, “Do you feel better now?” and leaves the room.

  • Ignore it and pick up your phone and call a friend or go for a walk.

Get the picture?

Your abusive partner will likely change at some point, but you can change the way you react to their verbal abuse.

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