How Does The Author Believeve We Learn Our Attachment Style Honesty – Its Power and Purpose

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Honesty – Its Power and Purpose

How much time and energy do we waste, trying to hide our true thoughts and feelings from Friends, Colleagues, Business Associates or Family?… maybe it’s worth it nice we have been conditioned to lie, and so have become pretending to be the person/what we think will gain approval and the most security for us. Ironically, the me that I’m pretending to be, can’t make the deal, because it’s not the real me. The real me sits behind the lies, lonely…just aching to come out and be seen, heard, and loved…like, with all my thoughts and feelings accepted and embraced. We have learned to trust each other that these little lies are necessary, so as not to hurt other people’s feelings…right?…wrong!

When we come closer, look more honestly at our false communication, for not hurting other people’s feelings … we see a deeper need that we have been hurt to protect, to begin since childhood. As children, we express ourselves freely until we realize that certain behaviors are not approved by our most demanding caregivers: parents, siblings, teachers and friends we are told that distorting our thoughts and feelings really leads to harmony, it shows respect and maturity. So we have seen & heard those in charge as an example of this, with their own truth to lie, while denying their own pride and courage. therefore, therefore…we have spent most of our lives copying their behavior, maintaining a pseudo version of ourselves, maintaining a contrived image, in order to be liked and included us.

Remember the last time a friend called you, and you were tired, didn’t want to speak, so you let it go to voice? You see them the next day and they remind you of their call. immediately you tell them…oh, I’m already sleeping, or…I’m not late. Rarely will we tell them we don’t want to talk…no, we want them to believe we won’t call them. we are the kind of people who always want to talk to them! How weak it is, all because we are afraid to express and take care of our own needs, having conflicting feelings… speaking and listening.

News flash… it’s possible to present your facts, contradictions, opinions and everything. In the end, real friends will respect you for this, or think you when you don’t!

It is difficult for us to have our true self, therefore, we bury it with pain, with drugs, alcohol, addiction, relationships, relationships and death, vaccines depression, equipment, etc.. aggressive behavior, hold of resentments, maybe for years, all in the name of … ‘being good, instead of real.’

Most of these can be solved by telling the truth, sharing our true selves, sharing our true fears, thoughts and feelings, regardless of what others think.

My personal journey has revealed that the ultimate joy and freedom can be yours, by choosing to stand still and listen, finally receiving the best respect for traditional beliefs sad

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